Part 28
A thousand pieces
**********************
When it was time for him to leave, he asked for a hug, he held me so close that I could hear his heart beat. I found myself closing my eyes and before I knew it, we were exchanging breaths, there's a voice inside of me telling me to pull away or push him away but my body didn't have the strength to let go. Seconds later, his lips were locked in mine, it didn't last for a minute but I felt it, the whole of me felt the magical touch of his soft gentle lips and it felt good. It was dark and quiet, it was just us, the whole has disappeared and there only sound we could hear was the sound of our breaths.
********
Maintaining my lie got easier ever since that day, I no longer felt bad for what I was doing because somehow a part of me felt something for him and things have been going well that sometimes I forget that it was just supposed to be temporary. There are a couple of things he didn't do like Alex used to, like cook for me, go to movies and have dinner out and he wasn't around everyday like Alex used to be but he made an effort during his free time of his busy schedule. At times I compared him to Alex but I know that no one will ever be like him and Samuel is as good as he can be.
********
After a month of doing what I was doing with Samuel, I was finally comfortable with him and it was getting serious, I felt something stronger for him each day that passes by. He even introduced me to Tulinawa, his sweet daughter and she's so pretty. She also became my new best friend, he sometimes brought her to me when he has to run errands and his sister is not around to babysit.
It is so strange that although this isn't the kind of relationship I dreamt of having, I was finding it easier to deal with. I always wanted someone with a couple of academic qualifications and I never wanted to be with someone who had kids of his own but I guess life has a away of turning things around because I loved every minute of my new life, every second I spend with Tulinawa but I mostly loved that Samuel was so hard working and a great father at the same time. He played soccer during his free time but still manage to make time for us, I admired everything about him.
I abandoned my idea of using him and started embracing our relationship. We were officially a couple. He threw me a suprise birthday party on my day and for the first time since we started, he said the words when he dropped me off at campus.
Samuel: I have been wanting to tell you something, I was just waiting for the best time to do it and I believe today is the day. I love you Susan, I was always afraid of inviting people in my life in fear of what it will do to my daughter but we both found a best friend in you . Thank you for giving us a chance, I promise to always be here for you. I love you and there's nothing you can say to convince me otherwise
I was suprised first of all and it just took me back to when I started doing this and why I was doing it, I figured I should be honest with him. I opened my mouth to confess but the words couldn’t just come out.
Me: I would be lying to myself if I say that I don't feel the same way for you. I love you
We said our goodbyes and he was gone and I slept like a baby. I think I kept smiling in my sleep. I was struggling to wake up in the morning and I thought I was dreaming that there's someone knocking at my door, it was soft and it went on for about a minute and that's when I realised that it wasn't a dream. In my sleepy voice, I invited whoever was knocking to enter.
There he was, standing in the doorway and with my pale eyes, I could still make out that it was him, my Alex.
*******
**********************
When it was time for him to leave, he asked for a hug, he held me so close that I could hear his heart beat. I found myself closing my eyes and before I knew it, we were exchanging breaths, there's a voice inside of me telling me to pull away or push him away but my body didn't have the strength to let go. Seconds later, his lips were locked in mine, it didn't last for a minute but I felt it, the whole of me felt the magical touch of his soft gentle lips and it felt good. It was dark and quiet, it was just us, the whole has disappeared and there only sound we could hear was the sound of our breaths.
********
Maintaining my lie got easier ever since that day, I no longer felt bad for what I was doing because somehow a part of me felt something for him and things have been going well that sometimes I forget that it was just supposed to be temporary. There are a couple of things he didn't do like Alex used to, like cook for me, go to movies and have dinner out and he wasn't around everyday like Alex used to be but he made an effort during his free time of his busy schedule. At times I compared him to Alex but I know that no one will ever be like him and Samuel is as good as he can be.
********
After a month of doing what I was doing with Samuel, I was finally comfortable with him and it was getting serious, I felt something stronger for him each day that passes by. He even introduced me to Tulinawa, his sweet daughter and she's so pretty. She also became my new best friend, he sometimes brought her to me when he has to run errands and his sister is not around to babysit.
It is so strange that although this isn't the kind of relationship I dreamt of having, I was finding it easier to deal with. I always wanted someone with a couple of academic qualifications and I never wanted to be with someone who had kids of his own but I guess life has a away of turning things around because I loved every minute of my new life, every second I spend with Tulinawa but I mostly loved that Samuel was so hard working and a great father at the same time. He played soccer during his free time but still manage to make time for us, I admired everything about him.
I abandoned my idea of using him and started embracing our relationship. We were officially a couple. He threw me a suprise birthday party on my day and for the first time since we started, he said the words when he dropped me off at campus.
Samuel: I have been wanting to tell you something, I was just waiting for the best time to do it and I believe today is the day. I love you Susan, I was always afraid of inviting people in my life in fear of what it will do to my daughter but we both found a best friend in you . Thank you for giving us a chance, I promise to always be here for you. I love you and there's nothing you can say to convince me otherwise
I was suprised first of all and it just took me back to when I started doing this and why I was doing it, I figured I should be honest with him. I opened my mouth to confess but the words couldn’t just come out.
Me: I would be lying to myself if I say that I don't feel the same way for you. I love you
We said our goodbyes and he was gone and I slept like a baby. I think I kept smiling in my sleep. I was struggling to wake up in the morning and I thought I was dreaming that there's someone knocking at my door, it was soft and it went on for about a minute and that's when I realised that it wasn't a dream. In my sleepy voice, I invited whoever was knocking to enter.
There he was, standing in the doorway and with my pale eyes, I could still make out that it was him, my Alex.
*******
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